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Shining through Suffering – Learning How to Cope with Sadness in EMS

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Medic Trommashear, who writes great stuff has offered to co-post with me on this. You can check it out at her blog: http://lookingthroughapairofpinkhandledtraumashears.com/

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This morning the wife came home from her night shift on the ambulance and told me a sad story. During the wee hours of the morning she handled a rather nasty fatality accident. The victim, a 20-something male was walking home from a party on a dark country road and tragically, a passing motorist didn’t see him in time and the accident ensured that he’d never make it. Pedestrian vs. car accidents at high speeds have a way of doing that.

Sad stories like this are getting more common for her as she’s immersed herself fully into paramedic school and professional EMS in general. She’s been seeing sad stuff multiple times per week it seems. I can see that it’s wearing on her and I feel her pain. I have experienced it quite a bit myself in my own career and I continue to do so on a regular basis. Jumping into full-time EMS exposes a person to sadness on a level that can’t easily be prepared for. A person just has to jump in with both feet and not be afraid to feel the range of emotions that they’re going to be exposed to. It’s hard, it’s tough, and it’s one of those things a person just has to learn how to overcome if they want to make EMS a part of their life.

That’s the part that most people don’t get, I think. The part where you have to “Learn How” to overcome the sadness and negative emotions we’re faced with as EMS people. A common statement that lay people make when they hear that I am a paramedic is “Oh, I could never do that job and see what you see. I just couldn’t handle it”. Perhaps they’re right, but I would guess that anyone can train themselves to handle almost anything. My pseudoscientific opinion is that we develop our tolerance and our healthy ways of dealing with being exposed to such negative emotions on a regular basis through experiencing it and learning ways to function and feel happy afterwards. It’s harder for some than others and I can’t imagine that there is a single roadmap for learning it. It’s individual. Friends help and so does an understanding family. Good coworkers are great to observe and learn from as long as they realize their own humanity and aren’t simply trying to fool themselves out of bravado. We’re all human and I can testify that we’re all affected, no matter how thick our skin may appear.

Back when I was a new medic I was working a ton of hours. I mean, I worked a lot. I worked TOO much. I worked for days on end without sleep for multiple jobs. At the time, I felt I had good reason. I was attempting college for the first time, taking care of my recently deceased father’s businesses, and trying to sock away money to help my mother. I worked a full-time EMS job, a full-time hospital job, ran the businesses, and volunteered for a separate fire department and EMS agency. It was nuts. I would literally go for days without sleep. During that time it seemed like I was getting slammed by horribly sad calls. I felt I was surrounded by suffering and death. I was working at least two codes a week on average. Mayhem and madness seemed to rule the day. I was getting deeper and deeper and…

I was going nuts.

I was horribly, deeply depressed.

I almost went insane.

I was at my darkest hour when I found myself angry at anything that was cute or fun. Literally things like jokes, teddy bears, and Hallmark cards made me angry. I just couldn’t see how people could stand to look at that kind of stuff when there was so much suffering in the world. How frivolous! What a waste of time! It made me angry to think of anything that didn’t acknowledge the pain I was bearing witness to on such a regular basis. I was depressed and angry. I just couldn’t understand anything other than feeling the pain that the people I was taking care of were feeling. It affected my life, my work, and my human interaction. It was horrible.

Then I had an epiphany that changed my personality and who I am to this day.

Those who meet me know that I like to joke around. A lot. There are things that I take seriously however I do not personally happen to be one of them. My epiphany was that the stuff that was cute, fun, loving, friendly, and/or happy was all that actually did matter in life. We combat the bad with the good, the yang with the yin. I chose to pay attention to the comedy of life and downplay the tragedy. After that revelation, my whole outlook on life and my personality changed for the better. I had found that comedy, friendship, and love were the ways to live my life. Come what may, I can make a joke about it and that makes it ok. I laugh at inappropriate times and seek out the good in life. My life and career ensure that I’ll still have an onslaught of human tragedy thrown at me whether I’m ready for it or not but If I can actively seek out the positive, I may just end up ahead of the game.

To my wife, I love you. Hopefully you don’t end up where I have been… but I’ll be here for you, come what may. I understand what you’re going through and I love you for this any many, many other reasons. Always.

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You may want to read one of my most popular posts. It’s an older post of mine where I explore what I call “Splashed Sadness”. It’s along these lines. We EMS people have to deal with a lot. Never be afraid to share it. Don’t hold it in. Get it out and learn how you can cope with it because there’s not a one of us ain’t human.

“Splashed Sadness – A look at Negative Emotions in EMS”

Or “Reflections on an Easter Morning” – another post about a bad call.

Also, don’t forget to check out Medic Trommashear’s co-post on this. You can check it out at her blog: http://lookingthroughapairofpinkhandledtraumashears.com/

(Note: I’ll link to the post directly when it’s up)

Posted by Ckemtp on August 30, 2010 • Filed under: EMS, EMS Health & Safety, EMS Topics, Emergency Medical Services, Fire Rescue Topics, Firefighter Safety & Health, Line of Duty, Paramedic, Training & Development, Uncategorized, bad calls, emotions, inside the mind of a paramedic, psychology, sadness

Red Lights to the Left of them, Blue to the right! – Coloring Emergency Lighting

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So you’re driving down the road in an unfamiliar state, let’s say that it’s Iowa or Wisconsin, when in your rear-view mirror you see flashing red lights on a big utility truck coming your way. You can’t really make out what kind of truck it is, but you see red lights flashing so you pull over to let it go by. When it does, you realize that you’ve just pulled over for a tow-truck.

Or how’s this? The same thing happens, but it’s a flashing blue light in Colorado. When you pull over, you realize that you just got pulled over by a snow-plow.

I live in Illinois and work between IL and Wisconsin and there’s quite a bit of a difference between the different lighting colors and upon who can use what color light for what purpose. As a volunteer paramedic/Firefighter in Illinois I run a blue light with no siren in my personal vehicle. Even though I rarely turn it on, I have it in case I get stuck behind a 20mph Grandma on my way to the Big One. Interestingly, the blue light gives me no legal authority or any legal leeway on traffic laws and I must obey all traffic laws even while running the light. I Wisconsin, however, volunteer firefighters and EMS people may use red lights and sirens in their personal vehicles. They have the same legal status as governmental emergency vehicles when they’re driving with their lights activated.

In Iowa, volunteer firefighters may run blue lights in their personal vehicles with no legal authority granted them, and EMS volunteers may run clear (white) lights in their personal vehicles. Volunteers for fire and EMS combination agencies may run a mixture of both, however if a person volunteers for both a separate Fire department and a separate EMS agency, they must be careful to run the clear light for EMS responses and the Blue light for fire responses.

Of course, that’s just for personal vehicles right? Allowing emergency lights in the personal vehicles of emergency volunteers is a debatable issue in some circles. I argue for responsible control of their use and think that they are needed in some communities and not needed in others. Out of the 400-500 volunteer runs I respond to annually, I probably turn on my blue light for less than ten percent of the runs. I use it judiciously, but I know others that I can say did not.

However, this isn’t a post about volunteer emergency lighting and the pros and cons of it. It’s about the messed up spectrum of colors that we use on emergency vehicles in this country. Sure, we have the same stock colors pretty much everywhere. Red, blue, amber (yellow), green, clear (white), and in some states purple (Yes! Purple!). In the southern states, blue lights are for law-enforcement only and red is for fire only. In Wisconsin, law enforcement runs red and blue lights and fire and EMS is red only. In Iowa, up until a few years ago everyone ran red lights except for volunteer firefighters. They changed the law and now allow blue on the Passenger side only. In the City of Chicago, the Chicago Police Department runs blue only and the Fire department runs Red and Green. Downstate Illinois (Read: Outside of the City of Chicago City Limts) runs red and blue for all “Authorized Emergency Vehicles” and blue lights for the volunteers. Green lights are only permitted on stationary vehicles for command lights but can also be used for private security officers. As I mentioned before, in Iowa and Wisconsin, tow trucks run red lights. In Colorado, snow plows run blue. In some states, funeral processions run purple.

Confused?  I sure as heck am.

Consider this: Different lighting colors exist because different members of the driving public see different wavelengths of light in the spectrum (i.e. “Colors”) better or worse in differing ambient light conditions. Also, different colors penetrate different atmospheric and/or ambient light conditions better than others. You can see blue forever at night or in the fog, but not so much in the bright light. Red washes out to amber in the day light but is still fairly visible. Clear lights penetrate for a very long way but can be confused with light reflecting off of a surface almost the same as amber lights. We need a diverse spectrum of colors emanating from our response vehicles in order to ensure that the highest amount of drivers out there are able to see the lights. If someone’s color blind to the particular light color that we choose, they’re not going to see us all that well, are they?

The arguments that I hear for the use of lighting colors don’t hold much weight with me. Who cares if the public is able to see that an approaching emergency vehicle is Fire, EMS, Law Enforcement, ASPCA, Haz-Mat, Tech-Rescue, Volunteer, or miscellaneous. They just need to pull over and get out of the way. One color lighting schemes may give the agency a sense of personality or whatnot, but they’re certainly not the safest way to be seen. An emergency vehicle needs to throw out a lot of light across the spectrum of visible colors in order to help ensure the safest response possible.

So why are we having this hodgepodge of warning light colors? Why do people think they’re a good idea? I can think of a few advantages of having “law enforcement only” colors, as in reducing false traffic stops from people impersonating police officers, but having one color and one color only simply makes it easier for a criminal to get a hold of that one color of light. Why fire would only need red lights is a question that I can’t come up with a good reason for.

So good luck driving out there! If you see me, I’ll be on the side of the road letting a tow-truck go by. Then I’ll run my blue light in Wisconsin because we got a house fire in my district that touches the WI state line and I’ll get arrested for impersonating a police officer. Then I’ll be at work getting into a crash because someone driving out there was color blind to the color red.

Anyone want to add to the confusion? What colors do your state or country use? Is anybody else in favor of a national standard?

Posted by Ckemtp on April 7, 2010 • Filed under: 911 fail, Administration & Leadership, Ambulance, Ambulance Driver, Ambulance maintenance, Command & Leadership, EMS, EMS Health & Safety, EMS Management, EMS Topics, EMS rant, EMS safety, Emergency Medical Services, Fire Rescue Topics, In the Line of Duty, Iowa, Iowa EMS, Line of Duty, Management, Technology & Communications, Vehicle Operation & Ambulances, Vehicle Operations & Apparatus, accident, ckemtp rants, code-3, drive fast, lights and sirens, politics, technology-communications-ems-topics, volunteer fire department, volunteer firefighter

Two Cases, One letter – From one Paramedic’s struggles, change can come

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A letter I received from a reader recently has gotten me just as mad as he is, even more so maybe. This letter came in from someone who identifies himself as a paramedic but asks that I protect his identity and location completely. I will do so, only identifying that the letter comes from someone who works out west, somewhere between the Mississippi and Montana but not east as Maine or as far south as Amarillo.

So He comes from somewhere in the US, not the east coast, and not Hawaii. He’s a paramedic and he’s male. That’s all I’ll say. I’m going to work the things he wrote me in his letter with my thoughts and feelings on what he wrote and the situation he wrote about. I’ll rewrite the letter keeping the point of it intact. I’m fairly sure that you’ll be just as angered as I. (Note – This is LONG but it’s good. It will probably tick you off too, enjoy)

(more…)

Posted by Ckemtp on February 25, 2010 • Filed under: Administration & Leadership, DNR, Do Not Resuscitate Order, EMS, EMS Health & Safety, EMS Management, EMS Topics, EMS ethics, EMS paramedics, EMS system, Emergency Medical Services, Ethics, Line of Duty, PR, Paramedic, Patient Handovers, Patient Management, Public relations, change, ckemtp rants, edemse, ems 2.0, ems education, everyday ems ethics, medical ethics, paramedic education, patient care, politics, potential, pride, profession, professionalism, rant, stories

Why I am Passionate about the Chronicles of EMS

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If you’re an EMS professional, you should be paying attention to the Chronicles of EMS.

I think every person involved in EMS on any level needs to pay attention to the work of three of the profession’s upcoming giants, Mark Glencourse, Justin Schorr, and Thaddeus Setla. Their collective project is a warp-leap forward for how our profession is presented to, judged by, and thought about by our internal and external observers, customers, and colleagues. With their efforts come Hope… Hope that one day soon EMS will take its rightful place as a true profession; Hope that our profession will get the paid the attention that it deserves; Hope that our educational standards, resource needs, and compensation will finally be improved; and Hope that we will be able to improve our total service to our patients and our community through shedding a new light on our profession.

If this works… everything could change. Everything could change quickly, incredibly, and wonderfully. Imagine if EMS became “cool” and the public finally thought about who we are, what we are, and what it is that we do for them. Imagine if people demanded that their community leaders pay as much attention to EMS as we need them too… Just Imagine.

EMS needs a strong, unified message. The Chronicles of EMS can be that message. It is a professional, smart, and uber-cool message aimed straight at where we want to be going. It is not lip service, it is not Hollywood glamour, and it is certainly not dramatized for profit. It is being prepared by industry-experts who are still working the same streets that we are everyday. Everyone involved is one of us. Everyone involved is passionate. Everyone involved wants this, and they want it as bad as you do.

The reason I write about EMS is because I want to improve our profession and our service to others. I want to make this better so bad that I can taste it and I’m willing to work as hard as I have to. Our patients and our communities deserve the best we can give them and I believe that key to fixing EMS is communication and the spreading of our message. This blog exists for that reason and so do the other blogs in this genre. The other bloggers, authors, speakers, and writers I’ve met have all spoken to me of the same goals. Our profession exists to save lives and alleviate suffering and improving our profession help us save more lives and alleviate more suffering in our communities. EMS does indeed make a difference out there in the world and we’re the ones doing it. The Chronicles of EMS is a great beacon of hope in our collective quest.

EMS Deserves More. Our Patients deserve more; Our Families deserve more; and yes… We deserve more. Mark, Justin, Ted, and everyone involved in the Chronicles of EMS are working hard to give us just that. They deserve our support and our attention.

I’ll be in San Francisco on March 11th for the premier of their pilot episode. I wouldn’t miss it for anything. Look out world, EMS is moving forward.

Posted by Ckemtp on February 8, 2010 • Filed under: Administration & Leadership, Command & Leadership, EMS, EMS Blog, EMS Health & Safety, EMS Management, EMS Topics, EMS blogosphere, EMS training, EMT, Emergency Medical Services, Fire Rescue Topics, Firefighter Safety & Health, Happy Medic, Line of Duty, News, Paramedic, Patient Management, Public relations, change, ems 2.0, ems education, humor, medicblog999, paramedic education, pride, profession, professionalism

Life Under the Lights – From behind the Windshield

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This post goes out to my blogger buddy @medicthree - (http://www.medicthree.com) whose been having a few rough shifts lately. If you’ve been having a few rough ones lately, this one’s for you too. It’s kind of a rambling, disjointed post about emotions in EMS. It made me feel better to write it. Here’s hoping that it makes you feel better to read it.

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Cruising down the interstate has always been a Zen-like experience for me. I do it a lot due to living here in the rural Midwest. I like it. It’s a quiet time for me to be alone with my thoughts… which can be both good and bad I guess. It’s not uncommon for me to point my car in the direction of some commonly travelled to destination and be exploring the depths of my subconscious mind the whole way. It’s my meditation time, my time to reconcile the goings on in the world with my opinions on them. I’ve had some of my biggest epiphanies with my foot on the gas pedal. Give me the radio, the open road, and a not-so-specific time to be somewhere and I can solve almost any problem I’ve got.

This morning’s cruise home from my Northern job was no different. Today the world was subtly shining with a brilliant white coat of ice. The icy fog that had lingered all night had coated each individual twig, blade of grass, and exposed surface with tiny fernlike diamonds giving the quarter-mile or so of visibility around me an eerie, ghost like quality. It was beautiful. I wonder if anyone else calls this stuff “Ice fog”?  I do. At least today I do. My father taught me that pilots call the small ice that builds up on the leading edges of airfoils and antennas “Rime Ice” and it was forming on my antenna as I cruised down the highway. It made me remember my dearly departed dad and smile to myself as I did it. Remembering things he taught me tends to do that. I’ve found that as I progress deeper into my own path of fatherhood I remember the things he taught me more and more. I try to pass that on to my own son but I suppose that I’ll always worry about not being able to live up to the task.

See what I mean? Just thinking about the drive time tends to make my thoughts ramble. Perhaps everyone does this, perhaps not… but I would think that everyone has their time alone with their thoughts. My time is my drive time. Perhaps it is yours as well.

Being a paramedic who thinks while driving affects my rides home from work the most, I believe. If you’re in the business, you know about the peaks and valleys of emotion and the human condition that we witness on our shifts. My drive home is my place to sort them out and reconcile the lowest valleys with the highest peaks so I can be more balanced. There’s been times where I’ve gone through a toll booth with tears streaming down my face, trying to regain my composure to give the toll-booth guy my patented “You ‘ave a good day, my friend” as I hand him my eighty cents. Other days I’m laughing like a fool while blaring European techno, country western, or whatever tripe the pop station’s playing repetitively these days. Sometimes I’m sullen, thinking about some stranger’s death that shouldn’t have happened. Sometimes I’m elated, thinking about something that’s just full of EMS win. Whatever the case, my thoughts tend to run down the calls I had over the previous day’s shift and I dissect my decisions and the circumstances that lead me to make those decisions while I’m sitting there alone in the car. I think that it makes me a better paramedic to do this, I also think that it keeps me only borderline insane. Someone once sent me an e-mail with tips on how to keep oneself with “A Healthy Level of Insanity” and I love that term.

I’m sorry that this post is just a bit of rambling on about emotional stuff, but I hadn’t posted in a while and this Sunday just felt like a good day to let my fingers put something out there. I’ve always believed that EMS people experience the world differently as they live their “Life, under the lights”. Our experiences and the viewpoint they give us make us just a bit different than our neighbors. We laugh at inappropriate times, our thoughts sometimes wander, and we take some things more seriously, and some things less seriously than others. While collectively we EMS people are a diverse lot, we share a common bond that could make me comfortable sitting down to throw back a cold one with almost any of my colleagues. That is, until we get onto a debate about some minor topic and both of us are right beyond the shadow of a doubt. I’ve told students that in the decade or so I’ve been doing this, working in a high-stress environment, surrounded by type-A, ADHD personalities who make their living on making the “right” decisions every time, I’ve ticked some people off along the line. If I hadn’t, I’d have been doing it wrong. I tell the students that they’ll tick some people off too and that they should have fun with it while trying to be as nice as they can and realizing that they can disagree with someone without having to dislike them… and vice versa.

Sometimes, this job sucks. Sometimes our best isn’t good enough… and sometimes we think that we weren’t able to our best for whatever reason. Those times are low times that can consume you in total darkness. Sometimes it’s just the opposite and your shift full of EMS Win leaves you full of inflated confidence. The lows are days when I drive the speed limit, the highs push me over a bit. My advice is to just remember what’s important to you and what your end goal in life is. You’ll get there if you keep travelling in that direction, no matter the speed you’re going at the time. Remember that this profession is like a sine-wave with peaks that can thrill you and valleys that can um, kill you if you let them get to you too much. Just remember, my friends. Someone up there has a purpose for all of this that we’re not meant to understand. Just keep doing your best, honestly putting forth the effort that leaves you honestly convinced that you’ve done your absolute best for everyone you’ve been charged to take care of and you’ll survive this stuff out there.

And keep driving.

Posted by Ckemtp on January 17, 2010 • Filed under: CISD, EMS Health & Safety, EMS Topics, Line of Duty, ckemtp, mental imagery, new perspective, profession, psychology, sadness, stories

Firefighter Killed, 8 injured in Wisconsin

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Http://www.Firefighterclosecalls.com has this sad news this morning regarding an explosion in Wisconsin that has claimed the life of one firefighter and left 8 others injured.

http://firefighterclosecalls.com/fullstory.php?98993

Our Thoughts and Prayers are with their families and our brothers in the St. Anna Fire Department 

Posted by Ckemtp on December 30, 2009 • Filed under: Fire Rescue Topics, In the Line of Duty, Line of Duty

Thanking Those who REALLY Deserve it – Merry Christmas

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I originally meant to post this during Thanksgiving, but this season seems appropriate enough. I love Christmas. It’s my most favorite time of year. I love family, friends, cooking, and giving gifts. I love Christmas parties, I love the fellowship, and I love being kind to everyone and having them not look at me strangely… ok *as* strangely as they do other times of the year.

And also, I tell people “Merry Christmas”. I don’t say “Happy Holidays”, “Happy Winder Holiday”, or “My lawyer sez to tell you ‘good luck”. If someone responds with “Happy Chanukah”, or “Happy Kwanza”, or “Happy MishMash Shaloob” I’m not offended by it and I’m happy that they wished me the sentiment so there ya go.

Oh, and to my UK friends, Merry Frumpydumples to ye’

So what’s my Christmas post going to be? Well, it’s about thanking who’s really important to thank. As you all know, I’m a volunteer paramedic and firefighter as well as being a career paramedic and firefighter. This time of year in the small towns, it’s pretty common to have people stop by and offer up sweet treats and tell us “Thank you” for what we do for them. Let me make the blanket statement that I really appreciate it folks, even if my waist line and my pending diabetes doesn’t. However, I don’t think that I deserve your thanks.

I have always gotten more from my service to others than I could ever hope to give back to it. I love EMS and I love the Fire Department and I love helping people. I identify with it and I couldn’t imagine my life without it. Even after a solid decade of running my “Life Under the Lights” I can’t imagine doing anything else. I am rewarded a thousand times over by every smile I get, every person I comfort, and every person that I am privileged enough to come into contact with as a caregiver.

So who should the people that wish to thank us actually be thanking?

Well , first thank my wife for every time that I’ve had to get up and leave for a volunteer call in the middle of a family dinner. Thank my kid for every time that I’ve missed out on play time, or story time, or nap time because the pager called me away. Thank my family for all of the times that they’ve had to do without me because I was working mandatory overtime. Thank my wife too for all the nights she sleeps alone because I’m on a 24 and am sleeping at the station. Thank my friends for all the times that I’ve stood them up on plans because I’ve gotten stuck running calls. Thank everyone who cares that I spend time with them, because a lot of the time I could be doing that I’m off caring for everybody else.

Thank the same people for every volunteer or public safety person you know… because without the caring and understanding of the people that truly matter in life for us, we couldn’t be out there doing it for you. They’re the heroes here.

That, and one more thing. I was never in the Military and I probably should have been. This may not be much, but Thank You to all of our Military Men and Women out there serving for me and my family. I can’t write enough to say how much I deeply, and truly appreciate your sacrifice… but from the most humble part of my heart, Thank You for everything you do. The same thanks goes to your families and loved ones as well.

Merry Christmas, Every one.

Posted by Ckemtp on December 24, 2009 • Filed under: 2009, Ambulance, EMS, EMS Health & Safety, EMS Motivation, EMS Topics, EMS ethics, EMS pep talk, Emergency Medical Services, Fire Rescue Topics, Firefighter, Firefighter Safety & Health, In the Line of Duty, Line of Duty, News, Paramedic, appreciation, fire, pride, profession, professionalism

Swinging a Sledgehammer and Thinking about the UK… Strange times

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So here’s the good news. The ambulance service I work for up North, “Ambo’s R’ us” has finally taken the leap and is getting us a new station. Yep, that’s right folks. I will no longer be living in squalor whilst working up here in the vast frozen wastelands.

Except for one little hitch in the gittyup.

In big ambulance services, when one gets a new station, usually the service employs people to work on the station, build and/or remodel the station, and move the stuff from the old location to the new one. Not so in a small, rural ambulance service. Nooooo…. Here, a paramedic is expected not only to work on the ambulance during their shift, they’re also expected to put on their tradesman hat and get their hands dirty.

So, yep… today Ckemtp was not *just* a paramedic. Today yours truly was a demolition man, a moving man, a wall-paper remover, and a carpenter’s apprentice. All of my crew mates were today too, as were the crews yesterday, and so will be the crews who are unlucky enough to come work ambulance shift any time in the next couple of weeks.

But here’s my mea culpa confession folks: I’m not handy.

There, I said it. I am so not handy that hardware stores actually have my picture up on their walls stating that I must ask for staff permission to enter their premises. Apparently they want someone to follow me around with a fire extinguisher because there’s a concern that I might come into contact with a carriage bolt or something and the resulting sparks will start a fire. I, like most of my colleagues, became paramedics because we’re generally not handy enough to get a good paying job in the construction and/or “real job” industry.

What’s that you say? You’re a full-time paramedic/EMT and you own/work/watch a construction business on the side? Well good for you. I don’t. I write stuff about stuff and ride ambos.

The dreaded “other duties as assigned” clause in my job description is being stretched so thin here that you can hear it singin’ in the wind. I didn’t sign up for this. It’s actually very hazardous to my health and well being for me to be doing anything remotely construction or “handyman” related.

There’s a lot of reasons why, the risk of fire, explosion, and/or structural collapse being amongst them… but they’re not the real reasons that I’m so worried about this. You see, I have a lovely wife named Gkemtp(it) who is the absolute light of my life. However, together we own a home which happens to be the scourge of my existence. Like EVERY guy who owns a home, my home is full of things that are disintegrating at an alarming rate. There’s ALWAYS something that needs fixing and they rarely respond to an IV, o2, and monitor. Heck, even my clock radio didn’t do well with defibrillation. I can’t give my clothes dryer Epinephrine to get it started again, my clogged drain didn’t respond to a heparin bolus, and my leaky faucet leaked right through an occlusive dressing. I just don’t understand my home and its malfunctions the way I understand humans and their maladies. It’s awful.

So my wife knows that I am the opposite of the handyman… and she’s pretty ok with it, lest she nag and have me end up breaking something much, much worse than it was before I tried to fix it. I *like* that she’s ok with it… And I don’t need her to think that I came to work, built us a shiny new ambo station, and learned how to be Bob Vila with an NREMT-P patch. It’s bad enough that I clean toilets, vacuum, and do dishes here at work. If she found that out, she might make me do more of that at home.

So I’m stuck here. I’m destined to make anything I fix much worse than it was before, I’m destined to demolish something I’m not supposed to demolish, and I’m destined to make an egregious wiring error that’s going to burn the place down while I’m sleeping inside of it and I won’t even get to go to the fire because I’m on ambulance detail!

Maybe I should move to the UK and work with my good buddy Mark Glencourse, of Medic999 fame. One of the biggest things I took from the Chronicles of EMS, his and Justin Schorr’s (The Happy Medic) foray into cross-national EMS exchange (Soon to be an AWESOME TV show!!) is that UK firefighters DON’T CLEAN THEIR OWN STATION! Yes. They FREAKING HAVE CLEANING CREWS THAT COME IN AND CLEAN UP ALL BUT THE MOST SUPERFICIAL MESSES! Hell, they even have a bona-fide chef to cook for them.

And here I am, scrubbing toilets and swingin’ a sledge hammer here in the ‘States.

So, I’ll keep toiling until I break something so bad that they make me go post somewhere where I can’t hurt myself, and Mark will keep living in the lap of luxury.

Maybe being a Limey isn’t so bad.

Posted by Ckemtp on December 20, 2009 • Filed under: 911 fail, EMS Health & Safety, EMS Humor, EMS Topics, EMS pep talk, EMS rant, Fire Rescue Topics, Line of Duty, UK paramedics, Your Happy Medic, appreciation, ckemtp, ckemtp rants, grumblemedics, humor, medicblog999, united kingdom